Not sure if you’ve GOT YOGA?
Here Are 12 Unpolished Signs That You’ve Definitely Been Bitten By The Yoga Bug:
1. You throw yourself a yoga-themed birthday party and title the invite: Hot Yoga With My OMies! The gift bags are filled with yoga candles, mini buddhas and laminated inspirational quotes.
2. You have packages at SIX different studios and are willing to cross county lines during rush hour traffic to make it to a killer class. Some days it feels like you’re on a Travel Yoga Team because you’ve left the house at 8:30am and won’t be back until it’s time to get on the carpool line.
3. You’ve mastered the art of packing multiple bags with all the Must Haves. Mat, sticky towel, extra hand towels to wipe the sweat away, bottled water, Vitamin water, straps, blocks, essential oils to spray on the mat, a separate towel for the shower, flip flops so your feet don’t have to touch the tile, a slew of toiletries, a dry change of clothes and a few plastic bags from Target to put your wet, dirty crap in for the ride home.
You’ve also managed to convert the Northwest corner of the women’s locker room at your local studio into a make-shift satellite office. People actually refer to you as “that girl who sits in the locker room working on her laptop before and after class.”
4. Your Mother stalks a stranger up and down the aisles of Whole Foods and all the way to the car in the parking lot because she knows you will def want to have a pair of the yoga pants this chick is wearing. Four days later a new pair arrives via UPS courtesy of Mom!
5. You have one or more of your yoga teachers’ contact info stored in your cell phone. On the rare occasion you’re running late, you send a text to have ’em save you a spot. The best part is they know exactly which “spot” in the room you want.
6. You never bring your phone into the yoga room anymore, WHICH IS HUGE! Screw it; If someone needs you, they’ll have to wait the ninety minutes. When you do check your phone after class, there are various text and voicemail messages that ALL begin with: “Hi, I’m guessing you’re probably in yoga but…….”
7. Your kids have added the word Namasté to their daily vocabulary and are becoming little yogis. Would you have it any other way?
8. You have a major yoga moment after climbing to the top of Mount Vesuvius near the ancient city of Pompeii in Italy.
9. You jot down words of wisdom that your yoga teacher says in class. Sometimes you may not even know what the hell he or she is talking about but it sure sounds amazing. “I could feel your energy today as you gave birth to the universe with your loins.” Ummm, I gave birth to what???
10. The majority of marital negotiations are now somehow all yoga-related. Since yoga is pretty time consuming, I usually don’t practice on the weekends because I feel unpolishedly guilty disappearing for hours. But then something like this happens:
My Husband: “Wanna make a deal?
Me: “Sure. Whaddya got?”
My Husband: “If you take the kids to Hebrew School in the morning so I can sleep in, I’m cool if you wanna dip out for an afternoon yoga.”
Me: “How ’bout if I drop off AND pick up? Can I take two classes? I’ll bring dinner home afterwards.”
My Husband: “Deal.”
Often, this scenario happens too:
My Husband: “You wanna go to yoga today?”
Me: “That sounds like a loaded question. What’s your angle?”
My Husband: “No. No angle. “
Me: “Pleazzze, there’s always an angle. Whaddya want?” (as if I don’t already know)
My Husband: “Well………….”
Me: “Power Blow in exchange for Power Flow? Take it or leave it.”
My Husband: “I’ll take it! Obviously.”
And there you have it folks… Happy wife. Happy life. It’s a win-win for both of us!
11. When asked for feedback about where to book a family vacation for your Mom’s 70th birthday, the only requirement you really care about (that is of course after confirming the all-inclusive alcohol and the 24/7 Kids Club with babysitters) is that the resort offers yoga classes!
12. Sometimes getting yoga stoned feels just as good (if not better) than getting regular stoned!
So what about you? Do you GOT YOGA?
JUST TO LET YOU KNOW… I knew I had been bitten by the yoga bug shortly after I began my practice two years ago. However, since recently having the honor of being named the November Student Spotlight for the Nama Stacy Yoga Corporation, I’m taking it as yet another personal sign that I definitely GOT YOGA?!