Sunday is Mother’s Day. It’s the one day out of the year that us Moms get freed from slavery. The oppressive [child] labor we’ve endured is recognized and we’re finally given a pat on the back for our tireless efforts. The second I hear scurrying feet and louder than necessary voices at the crack of … Continued
[slideshow id=17] LISTEN UP PEOPLE, I NEED TO MAKE IT CLEAR THIS SUNDAY MAY 12TH IS A BIG DAY IN THE YEAR. THOU SHALT HONOR THY MOTHER WHOSE DEVOTION IS EXCEPTIONAL YOU MUST LIFT HER WHERE SHE BELONGS, HIGH UP ON THE PEDESTAL! BECAUSE SHE’S BASICALLY A SLAVE WHO DOES ALL THE WORK FOR FREE … Continued
[slideshow id = 15] Quieting the mind feeds the soul. To find happiness, you must look within. According to the school of Hindu, yoga is a philosophy advocating and prescribing a course of physical and mental disciplines for attaining liberation and the ability to achieve control of the body and mind. Easy, right? Not so … Continued
[slideshow id=14] SHANTI. SHANTI. OHM. PEACE. BREATHE TEN MORE MINUTES AND I GET TO LEAVE. SHANTI. SHANTI. OHM. OHM. OHM I’M F@#%KING STARVED AND I WANNA GO HOME! THOUGH STAY OR PLAY SEEMS MY ONLY CHOICE “CAN WE PAUSE FOR A SNACK?” SAYS MY INNER VOICE. SACRED ENERGY FLOWS THROUGH THESE FOUR WALLS BUT … Continued
[slideshow id=13] RUNNER: noun A person, animal or thing that runs, especially as a racer. RUN: verb To move swiftly on foot so that both feet leave the ground during each stride. By definition, I suppose I can call myself a runner. Except of course, after I fell short this past weekend, I’d have to … Continued
[slideshow id=12] HOT, HUNG OVER AND ILL-PREPARED WITH A BANGED UP KNEE, I’M TIRED AND SCARED. AT 4:30AM MY PHONE STARTS TO BEEP I’M BLEARY-EYED FROM ONLY FOUR HOURS OF SLEEP. I MADE A COMMITMENT SO I HAVE TO GET UP AND GO BUT IF I WENT BACK TO SLEEP WOULD ANYONE KNOW? I … Continued
[slideshow id=11] The post I had originally planned to publish today had to do with examples of situations that were so annoying it left me with no other choice and no more fitting a response than to say, “FUCK THAT SHIT!” However, given the recent headlines in the news over the past two days, I … Continued
I HOPE YOU’RE NOT OFFENDED BY THE WORDS I UTTER MY FILTHY MOUTH TENDS TO FESTER IN THE GUTTER. DON’T BE FOOLED BY MY PETITE SIZE OR THE TRUCK DRIVER TALK MIGHT COME AS A SURPRISE. I WON’T CHANGE MY WAYS… NOT ONE SINGLE BIT I’M WEAK WITH THE MANNERS BUT STRONG WITH THE GRIT! … Continued
[slideshow id=9] -ISMS: According to the Urban Dictionary, (my favorite online source for all things slang) -ISMS are something about a person that is unique to them and is added to the end of their name. i.e., BEN-ISMS According to me, -ISMS are exactly what my reliable reference says, OR… the funny shit I hear kids say. … Continued
[slideshow id=5] The bigwigs. The sharks. The movers and the shakers. All of ’em are go-getters who know exactly what they want and how to get it. The main commonality these like-minded individuals share is their innate ability to think BIG! Unfortunately, I’m not really a bigwig and I’m hardly a shark. I’m more of … Continued
